******Disclaimer---as suggested from the title, this blog contains information about "girly" issues and may be unsuitable for punk ass men who don't like to discuss periods and all things involving the words" feminine hygiene"*****
A few days ago, one of my more annoying co-workers/supervisors announced that she was going to the drug store for a "girl emergency" (yes-she announced this. . see why she's labeled annoying?) Anywho, when she returns, she tells me and another of our co-workers, Kristyn about this product that has "changed her adult life" (yep-she's pretty dramatic too). Somehow, I lost the war between Kristyn and myself of who could look the least interested and therefore have her shut her fucking mouth. So I somehow get cornered by this woman and try my best to think happy thoughts to drown out the sound of "angry me " yelling "JUST CHOKE THAT BITCH!" until I heard the words, "and you can still have sex with them". Huh? Yes, the mere mention of the word sex had me completely enthralled in whatever else was about to escape this woman's lips. What was this crazed woman speaking of? Instead Softcups!.
Now, I must admit, she lost me for just a moment when she said you can keep them in for up to 12 hours, because I immediately thought "you nasty bitch. . .!" . But then she re-iterated the main point that first drew my attention: YOU CAN STILL HAVE SEX!"
She then puts something in a purple wrapper and a tiny booklet in my hand and tells me that you use it just like a diaphragm and for me not to knock it 'til I try it. I take the items and place them in my bag thinking, "I'm not using this shit! For all I know three months from now I'll see one of those lawyer commercials that start off "Have you or someone you know experienced itching and burning of the cervix accompanied by a greenish tint to the vagina since using "Instead Softcups?"
So in my pocket it remained . . . that is until my "Auntie." came on the same day that me and my dude made plans to get some serious grown-up time in. I went to the internet to do a quick research surf and came away with all the infor I needed before finally concluding, "Fuck it, I'm horny" before snatching the little purple packet off of my dresser. i inserted it a few hours before my dude was supposed to come so that I could get adjusted to it by myself for awhile. I was pleased to realize that there was no adjustment time needed, as it went in quick and easy and I could not feel a thing.
I went back and forth to the bathroom every 10 minutes or so just to make sure there was no leakage. No disappointments there. The only thing that did concern me was that I could feel the rib of the Softcup with my finger and I wondered whether he would feel this once we were "doing it". Once he came, I let him in on the situation- just in case there was a malfunction of some sort - and we went on with our night.
The final verdict. . .
This product (app. $7.99 for a 14ct box) has forever changed my life!
No, seriosly, though. . it has. . .
I absolutely recommend this product to any female who, like myself, feels like those 3-5 "lady days" out of each month just sucks all of the fun out of having a nice big, black,thick, long schlong waiting patiently for the "well" to drip it's last crimson drip.
So here are some of the basics for the lazies who won't research themselves:
Instructions (straight from their website)
1. To insert, squeeze the opposite sides of the rim together.
2. Insert Instead completely into the vagina.
3. Instead molds itself to your unique internal shape, creating a personal fit.
4. To remove Instead, simply hook your finger under the rim and slowly pull.
Warnings (straight from their website)
Do not use Instead if you are using an intrauterine device - IUD, as there is risk of dislodging, displacing or removing the IUD by pulling on the IUD string when removing Instead.
If you have ever had Toxic Shock Syndrome - TSS, do not use Instead or any other internally worn products.
Maximum wear time is twelve hours.
Instead must be changed after 12 hours.
Never reuse Instead, since doing so may expose you to the risk of vaginal infection.
Immediately following childbirth, miscarriage, or termination of pregnancy, consult your physician before using Instead.
Instead is not a contraceptive and does not provide protection against sexually transmitted diseases.
If you or your sexual partner develop burning, itching, pain, or swelling in the genital area or discomfort with urination, discontinue using all internal protection and contact your physician.
If you have problems removing Instead, you can contact your physician.
For those who are interested, Walgreens.com has about 40 reviews on the softcup from women who have used them. The deciding factor for me was reading some of the reviews on different sites and seeing that some women had been using them for 10+ years.
From what I can tell from my one time using it, the pros and cons seem to be as follows:
PROS
- You can still have sex
-they can be worn for up to 12 hrs (I personally would not do this, but to each their own)
- You can still have sex
- You can still have sex
CONS
- The removal/disposal process is messy. I plan to only do this at home.
- There is a slight chance that your vagina will turn green
*For more info, check out their page www.myspace.com/instead
*Please note that the above blog is strictly suggestive. I hold no medical degree whatsoever and cannot endorse anything as medically sound because of this. Furthermore, I have no ties to the company Instead and can in no way be deemed liable should your vagina turn green *
A few days ago, one of my more annoying co-workers/supervisors announced that she was going to the drug store for a "girl emergency" (yes-she announced this. . see why she's labeled annoying?) Anywho, when she returns, she tells me and another of our co-workers, Kristyn about this product that has "changed her adult life" (yep-she's pretty dramatic too). Somehow, I lost the war between Kristyn and myself of who could look the least interested and therefore have her shut her fucking mouth. So I somehow get cornered by this woman and try my best to think happy thoughts to drown out the sound of "angry me " yelling "JUST CHOKE THAT BITCH!" until I heard the words, "and you can still have sex with them". Huh? Yes, the mere mention of the word sex had me completely enthralled in whatever else was about to escape this woman's lips. What was this crazed woman speaking of? Instead Softcups!.
Now, I must admit, she lost me for just a moment when she said you can keep them in for up to 12 hours, because I immediately thought "you nasty bitch. . .!" . But then she re-iterated the main point that first drew my attention: YOU CAN STILL HAVE SEX!"
She then puts something in a purple wrapper and a tiny booklet in my hand and tells me that you use it just like a diaphragm and for me not to knock it 'til I try it. I take the items and place them in my bag thinking, "I'm not using this shit! For all I know three months from now I'll see one of those lawyer commercials that start off "Have you or someone you know experienced itching and burning of the cervix accompanied by a greenish tint to the vagina since using "Instead Softcups?"
So in my pocket it remained . . . that is until my "Auntie." came on the same day that me and my dude made plans to get some serious grown-up time in. I went to the internet to do a quick research surf and came away with all the infor I needed before finally concluding, "Fuck it, I'm horny" before snatching the little purple packet off of my dresser. i inserted it a few hours before my dude was supposed to come so that I could get adjusted to it by myself for awhile. I was pleased to realize that there was no adjustment time needed, as it went in quick and easy and I could not feel a thing.
I went back and forth to the bathroom every 10 minutes or so just to make sure there was no leakage. No disappointments there. The only thing that did concern me was that I could feel the rib of the Softcup with my finger and I wondered whether he would feel this once we were "doing it". Once he came, I let him in on the situation- just in case there was a malfunction of some sort - and we went on with our night.
The final verdict. . .
This product (app. $7.99 for a 14ct box) has forever changed my life!
No, seriosly, though. . it has. . .
I absolutely recommend this product to any female who, like myself, feels like those 3-5 "lady days" out of each month just sucks all of the fun out of having a nice big, black,thick, long schlong waiting patiently for the "well" to drip it's last crimson drip.
So here are some of the basics for the lazies who won't research themselves:
Instructions (straight from their website)
1. To insert, squeeze the opposite sides of the rim together.
2. Insert Instead completely into the vagina.
3. Instead molds itself to your unique internal shape, creating a personal fit.
4. To remove Instead, simply hook your finger under the rim and slowly pull.
Warnings (straight from their website)
Do not use Instead if you are using an intrauterine device - IUD, as there is risk of dislodging, displacing or removing the IUD by pulling on the IUD string when removing Instead.
If you have ever had Toxic Shock Syndrome - TSS, do not use Instead or any other internally worn products.
Maximum wear time is twelve hours.
Instead must be changed after 12 hours.
Never reuse Instead, since doing so may expose you to the risk of vaginal infection.
Immediately following childbirth, miscarriage, or termination of pregnancy, consult your physician before using Instead.
Instead is not a contraceptive and does not provide protection against sexually transmitted diseases.
If you or your sexual partner develop burning, itching, pain, or swelling in the genital area or discomfort with urination, discontinue using all internal protection and contact your physician.
If you have problems removing Instead, you can contact your physician.
For those who are interested, Walgreens.com has about 40 reviews on the softcup from women who have used them. The deciding factor for me was reading some of the reviews on different sites and seeing that some women had been using them for 10+ years.
From what I can tell from my one time using it, the pros and cons seem to be as follows:
PROS
- You can still have sex
-they can be worn for up to 12 hrs (I personally would not do this, but to each their own)
- You can still have sex
- You can still have sex
CONS
- The removal/disposal process is messy. I plan to only do this at home.
- There is a slight chance that your vagina will turn green
*For more info, check out their page www.myspace.com/instead
*Please note that the above blog is strictly suggestive. I hold no medical degree whatsoever and cannot endorse anything as medically sound because of this. Furthermore, I have no ties to the company Instead and can in no way be deemed liable should your vagina turn green *
3 comments:
*scratching head*
So wait...you're saying you can still have sex? haha. Sike naw, for real...two questions. Is the turning green thing for real?? And how can a man (a manly one, I might add) like myself make a woman awares of this seemingly valuable big tidbit of information?
-Darryl
see, I was all for it and everythang...until you mentioned the green vagina lol
And you said 3-5 "lady days"?! Man, I wish...how 'bout SEVEN? lol This cant be life lol
Darryl: I'd say stop by a Walgreen's or something with your girl one day and pretend to be lost and wind up in the Femenine hygeine aisle and just happen upon it. Or . . . .show her this blog. lol
And yes, my dude, YOU CAN STILL HAVE SEX! In the words of the Almighty Stan from Martin, "Changed My LIFE!!!" lol
btw: the whole green vajayjay thing, I sure as hell hope not! lol
SEVEN. Damn. I am so sorry. I iwll never bitch about having it the whole five days again. But we both have it easy, my sister only gets it 4 times ayr and when she does it lasts a good 9. I> would.DIE. . .
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