Street Fighter: Game OVER

Ok, so remember the last paragraph of the Street Fighter's sequel blog and how we were supposed to meet up to see Alice in Wonderland? Yea, well he stood me up. No phone call, nothin. Now this is cool considering I expected it and was actually already at the nail salon once 6:15pm (the time the movie started) rolled around. I didn't call or text him to see what happened. In fact, I can honestly say I didn't think twice about him or our planned date until Saturday night when me and my friends got to Barbara's and he was at the front door. They were packed to capacity and had stopped letting folk in (until the four of us got there). He let my freinds in then held me back and gave me a hug, he tried to kiss on me but I gave him the hands-on-chest pushaway and proceeded to the bar. I left out without saying bye to him and Sunday he sent me a text that says, "What,s good with you today so get back to me" to which I respond, "What happened to me seeing you friday?" An hour goes by and I get no response so I send a text that said "Hellloooo...". Still no reponse. At this point I just want him to give me whatever lame excuse he has so that I can let him know that I need a more intelligent reliable dude in my stable and give him his walking papers (without damaging my chances of ever getting in Barbara's again.)

So this morning our text convo goes like this:

Me: "What happened to me seeing you friday?

Street Fighter: Good moning to you (yes, "moning")

Me: Good morning. What happened to me seeing you on friday?"

Street Fighter: "I,am going to call you leter." (yes,, "leter") 

Me: I want to know why you asked to see me, then stood me up with no phone call or nothing."

Street Fighter: "My baby,s wasing filing going becus that way i forgot to call you to let know." {I have no idea what the fuck this means. I forwarded it to my friend 'T" and she was just as stumped as I. If any of you speak Stupid please let me now if you can interpret this for me. kthanx.}

Hhe then sends this text right after, " Look i went you so bad." To which I replied," Nah. You can't have me. Take care." He then sent a text that read. "You got that" (whatever the fuck that means).

So now I am street fighter free (yay) and luckily in such a way that I don't look like the bad guy, or get kicked in the face cause you know that nigga know karate lol. so getting into Barbara's shouldn't be an issue. But, just in case, I've been letting the bouncer that works the back door there flirt with me. I made sure to let him know that I was talking to Street Fighter when he asked for my number a few weeks ago and I let him know that I couldn't give it to him. Still, he's continued to flirt and buy me drinks so I think I'm good.

On to the next one....

I didn't get to see Sweet Black Pipe this weekend because he was in Atlanta *insert sad face here* . He text me when he got back and asked if I missed him. We'll see what happens with him....

TaTa for now.....

p.s. I really hope Street Fighter didn't think that funky ass bracelet (as pretty as it is) was gonna get him a ticket to Candyland. He better get outta here. lol

Introducing: The Street Fighter {Pt. Deux}/ Random Chick

Clickity click here for part one.

The next day, Street Fighter calls me and we have maybe a one hour conversation where I learned quite a few things about him:

1- He has THREE children, all girls, randing in age from 3-14.

2- His 14 yr old is living in Florida with her mom buts wants to come live with him and he told her "when I find me a good woman you can come back". {WHAT THE FUCK?}

3- Street Fighter is by noooo means the brightest bulb in the box nor the sharpest knife in the drawer. In fact, he's kinda dumber than a bag of really dumb rocks.

4- Though he is clearly in shape, over the phone he sounds as if he weighs 400+ pounds and someone is holding his head under water. He probably sounds like this in person too, but the music in the bar has probably helped in me not noticing. That and the many shots of Jeremiah on Fire! lol

5- He dominates the conversation, but really says absolutely nothing!

At this point I realize that giving him my number was a mistake since there's no possible way for me to ever even consider dating him. You know, since that whole communication thing is pretty important to me. We get off of the phone and I call my bestie, "T" who informs me that I better do what I gotta due because she ain't about to be turned away from Barbara's. lol

The next day, Monday night, I get a call from a number I don't recognize. I think nothing of it and send it to voicemail.

On Tuesday, Street Fighter and I are texting our convo goes like this:

(ripped straight from my cell)

Street Fighter: 'What,s up bab"

Me: "Nothin much. How are you?"

Street Fighter: "I,am ok today but I went you"

Me (fighting the urge to write something insuling back like "You went with me where?" Instead I write): "You keep saying that but you can't tell me what it is you want from me"

Street Fighter: "what I went is to make love to you and went you to be with me." (yes he really kept spelling "want" as "went") *sigh*

Me: You don't even know me tho

Street Fighter: I know enough to be with you (no he doesn't)

Me: Well I don't know enough about you (and what I do know ain't good homie)

Street Fighter: Well you sood know by now

Me: How? I only see you at the bar when you're working

Street Fighter: "That,s y you sood see me mor" (yes, he continued to use a comma as an apostrophe and spelled "should" as "sood" again)

Me: "U've never asked to c me tho

Street Fighter: "I all way,s what to see you that,s y i call you all the time" (Yes, that is exactly how he wrote it)

At that point I just stopped reponding because quite frankly his lack of respect for the English language and the rules of punctuation was pissing me off to the highest level of pisstivity.

The next day I get this text from the same number that I had ignored the call from on Monday night:

"Street Fighter said he don't foot u like him cuz u always foot wit ur friends" (yes, the word "foot" was randomly placed within the text like that.) I don't respond and I figure that the number belongs to random chick from the bar before aka Street Fighter's friend. I'm automatically disgusted thinking this grown ass man is on some real grammar school type ish and I ain't got the time. Like seriously was he sitting there telling her to text that crap to me? Cause how old is everybody here? Smch

The next day I get a call again from the number and this time I answer it and put my phone on mute. I hear a girl's voice telling a kid to go get some cereal (it's like 9pm on a Wednesday btw). She then says "Hello" as if she just remembered she'd made a call and I hang up. The hell would we have to talk about?????

The next day get a text from her with a picture of some chick laying down in a bed completely topless, nips and all showing. The text said something about the girl spreading HIV all over east and westside (don't know where the hell that is since that does not describe the areas of my city at all). The text gives the girl's full name and asks that I forward it to everyone I know so that she doesn't get them too since she likes guys and girls. Now I'm pissed. Like how the hell does this chick think it's ok to send porn to some strange woman's phone??? Plus, what the hell I look like forwarding that? For all I know the chick is completely innocent of what she's been accused of and someone is just trying to spread nasty rumors about her. I delete the texts and me and my bestie decide that Street Fighter must go, but in a way as to not get us banned from Barbara's forever.

Two days later random chick sends me a text that read: "Can you send a pic of you so that I can have it so when you call I could see you i gadgu a new phone and don't have any pic no more in the phone". *Sigh* 1- I don't call you, so right there your whole theory as to why you need my pic is debunked. 2- You never had a pic of me in your phone- new phone or not. Again, I ignore her.

We do our usual bar hop the next weekend (the same day I fried Sweet Black Pipe some chicken  ) and Street Fighter calls me while we're at the Sticky Rug and I ask him why he gave old girl my number. He tells me he don't know what I'm talking about and I tell him I'll be there in a lil while and we'll talk about it then. My friend Egypt hears all this and says that random chick had her number as well and that she'd gotten the feeling that 'ole girl was kind clingy. This sets my side eye off something serious and I started to think maybe Street Fighter didn't give her my number after all, maybe my "friend" Egypt did.

We get to Barbara's and again Street Fighter is profuesly denying giving her my number and is saying he doesn't know why she'd be calling me either. Whatever. I let it go for the night and coninue to enjoy myself. (that is until we are heading to the pizza parlor at the end of the night and Egypt asks me for a kiss then gets mad when I decline causing me to spazz out yelling. SMH Another story, for another blog entry on another day...)

The next day, Sunday, I decide enough is enough and I text old girl and ask "Who is this and how did you get my number" to which she replies, "Old Girl and you gave it to me." I swear that text right there was my equivelient to "The call is coming from inside the house." lol I start trying going back to that night to see when I could have possibly given her my number. Then I remember a very important fact- I'm not beat> There is no way on God's green Earth that I gave any random looking chick my number. Uh uh..it ain't happen. Anyone that knows me knows at least this one fact: I don't trust chicks and I don't need anymore friends. Point blank. Now I will admit to have a bi-curious side to me, however, i don't use my pimp hand for memebers of the same sex. And IF I ever did, it would be on a chick that I thought was a certified banger. The fact that I insist on labeling old girl as "random chick" or "old girl" {lol} speaks volumes to the fact that looks-wise she failed is average at best.  I conferred with my bestie and she called bullshit at just the thought.  Clearly someone is trying to bamboozle me. I'm really just not sure if it's my "friend" Egypt or Street Fighter at this point tho.

My bestie also suggested that old girl might be a lil smitten with the kid. Always a Modest Molly*, I shot down that theory with the quickness. But, that was before I received yet another text from old girl, this time inviting me to her upcoming birthday bash where she says all invited should "be on yur Best I will be having a few CELEBS coming thur to Celebrate with..." and included this pic:

  

I think now is definately a good time for me to be scared. lol But I also think that, should she call/text me again, I am well within my bitch boundaries to give her a good what for.

As for Street Fighter, he text me today wanting to know "Win we going to sin time togith". lmao Dumber than  a bag of dumb ass rocks, ain't he? lol

At first I said I wanted to go eat, but my bestie helped me realize that I'd then have to talk to him. Since I have no intentions on being sober during our "date" and since I have been wanting to see Alice in Wonderland higher than a high kite, I told him I wanna see that instead. Now, if he declines, I'll be able to be like, "OMG, you're so selfish and not at all attentive to my needs and because of this we can just never be!" *insert dramatic exit here* lol Either way, trust ya girl will have a story to tell...and really, that's what it's all about ain't it?

Later my lovlies!

* Ha!! Modest Molly my ass!!!!! What I need to due is olearn how to turn all this sexy off!!! lol Just kidding...but seriously tho...

Introducing: The Street Fighter

The Street Fighter is one of the bouncers at Barbara's. He stands at about 6"4 and is a fairly decent looking guy besides that fact that he has a mustache a little thicker than I like and I only see him in his "bouncer gear". Nontheless, when he started flirting with me a month or so ago, I knew he'd be asking for my number soon. In my head, this worked out great since I'm trying to date more "corny" guys as opposed to thugs. Plus, dating the bouncer can only work in mine and my friends' favor- Right? lol (Wrong.)

About a month ago he gave me his business card. According to the card he's a construction contractor. Ok, cool. But, I didn't call. I'm kinda old-school that way. I feel like the guys should make the first move (and had I not been so inebriated, I probably would have told him that instead of actually taking the card.) But anyway, when I saw him (at Barbara's) the next time, we had a chance to chat. Now mind you, we were in the bar, I was under the influence of not only liquor but chief as well and the music was hella loud. Someone should have told him that that was not the time to try to have a even semi-serious conversation with me, but he did anyway. Our convo went something like this:

Street Fighter: So yea blah, blah, blah, blah blah, something, something, something...I'm just waiting on this guy to accept my challenge and then we'll see what happens.

Drunk & Hot Girl ME: Your challenege? To tap dance????

Street Fighter: No, to fight for the championship belt. (hence his nickname)

Drunk & Hot Girl ME: Oh. *wrinkles face* I thought you did construction, not karate

Street Fighter: I don't do karate

Drunk & Hot Girl  ME: But you just said...

Street Fighter: *takes out and gives me business card AGAIN* I'm a contractor. I do it all construction wise.

Drunk & Hot Girl ME: Oh!!! Do you change lightbulbs? I just moved and my light fixtures are too high

Street Fighter: laughs

I then give him the card back and let him know that I don't wanna keep taking them to put my chewed-up gum in b/c they probably cost him a grip since they had color and everything (I'm drunk remember? lol) So then I put my number in his phone and walk away. (real talk, I was pissed because he laughed at me needing my light bulb changed. I was dead ass serious and drunk lol

Anyway, he eventually calls me but it was like a few days after my dad passed and I really wasn't in the mod to kick it.  He called again a few days leter and we had the chance to get to know one another, but he chose to spend the time telling me all of his friends' business. (<_<) The main one he seemed to talk about is some female friend of his. He tells me all of her business, the dude's she started messing with business, why they haven't had sex yet, that the dude sells drugs, just a bunch of stuff that I did not need to know. He gossiped so much, in fact, that I made a mental note to not tell him (or have him witness) anything I would not want spread around.

The next time I see him is actually the same night that I gave Sweet Black Pipe my number. We get to Barbara's and it's a DJ night which means they have a $5 cover at the door. As I go to pay, Street Fighter comes out of nowhere and tells the owner, who's at the door taking money, that I'm with him and I get in free. Ok, 1/2 a cool point for him. He'd have gotten a whole one had he let my girl in free too. lol Anyway, we (my friend "T" and I) get inside and see that our friend "Egypt"(E)*  is already there and talking to some random chick at the bar. I don't pay much attention to this because E make no secret of the fact that she's bi and always on the prowl.  I order my drink and start dancing to the music. I may have had a short convo with the chick sitting with E, but definitely nothing major since my focus was on getting as buzzed as possible and shaking my bon bon as hard as I could.

I make my way to the back to use the restroom and Street Fighter, who's working the back door grabs me up. He tells me that the random chick sitting with E is the friend he's always talking about and he calls her and points to me so that she can see the chick he's now in love with (his words). I stay and talk to him for a minute and then I go off to a corner by myself and dance. I see Egypt heading straight for me looking like she wants to dance and I stop dancing and go back to where "T" is sitting with the random girl. This time I'm already zoning so I'm not really talking to anyone. I make another run to the ladies' room about half an hour later and I feel someone put something in my hand and hear a deep voice tell me, "I saw this and thought about you my little butterfly". I look down and it's a little drawstring jewelry bag with a butterfly bracelet (below) in it. I look up and see the Street Fighter walking away.

I'm impressed....until he begins to text me.

p.s. He's actually listed in my phone as Street Fighter and his ringer is "Everybody was Kung Fu fighting.... lmao

To be continued....

*I've known her since I was like 11. Egypt is in love with me and scares me. There will be a blog dedicate dto her and her antics very soon.

Introducing: The Sticky Rug, Barbara's and The NightLite [Enigma likes her yak}

Ok, So before I can introduce you guys to The Street Fighter, I think it’s important to first introduce the watering holes that I frequent so that it all kinda makes sense. Let me start off by saying I am not a club girl. In fact, I HATE clubs. It’s too much for me. What I do love, however, are bars. It’s more of an intimate atmosphere and for the most part, you know most of the people there. Plus you get to play your own music- double plus for a music snob like me.

That being said, when my girls (whom I will also introduce to you all in the coming weeks) and I decide to get together and go out, our night usually goes Sticky Rug>Barbara’s and sometimes the NightLite.*

The Sticky Rug

This is usually where we go to get the party started. It is definitely the epitome of a hole-in-the-wall dive, but we love it. There’s a pool table when you first walk in, a friendly, older gentleman bartender that loves when we come in and a sticky rug (hence our nickname for it) lol . The bartender/owner there, James, calls us the “Light ‘em up girls” because when we come in we order shots of Jeremiah Weed on Fire (pictured above) and drink it while it’s lit. For the most part, the crowd there is older (I’m talking 40+) with a few young heads (like us) sprinkled in. we like to go there b/c the likelihood of us getting shot is low (which is definitely a risk you take when bar hopping in the hood) and we can go there without worrying about getting dressed up (unless we’re their pre-gaming for an actual party or event that we heading to later in the evening). The Sticky Rug is like our very own Cheers and it hasn’t disappointed yet. Another plus for that place is that most of the drinks are $2.50. Heeeeeey! There was that one incident where OG came by to buy us drinks and this old lady he went to school with tried to play me to the left and take him home. That was the night I whispered in his ear "You kow I'm crazy and I've been drinking AND I got my girls in tow. You better get this bitch before I cancel her ass"...perhaps I'll tell that story another day. lol 

Barbara’s

The second spot we usually hit this is where it’s poppin more often then not. Though this place resembles The Sticky Rug during the week as far as the age of the crowd, come Saturday night the age group ranges anywhere from 21 and all the way up. This is where the negroes and negrettes come to be seen and put on their finest hood attire. Sometimes they have a DJ, but DJ or not it’s usually packed and alive unless there’s a party going on somewhere else. Because of this, the likelihood of getting shot is like 5x’s greater than at the Sticky Rug (which is why unlike at the sticky rug, this place has bouncers at the door checking id’s and patting folk down), but we tend to have a spidey sense as to when it’s time to bounce. Usually when the bouncers announce that they’re not letting anyone else in is when we get our last round in plastic cups and head out b/c we know some idiot is gonna be mad enough to shoot up the place if they or their man’s n’em can’t get in.

The NightLite

Now this is our home bar. Right around the corner from the pj’s where my friends and I grew up, The NightLite is where all the ppl from our old neighborhood tend to celebrate their birthdays. My friends and I, for the most part are kind of snobbish when it comes to our old hood. We have all moved out and on to better things and we tend to not really kick it with the ppl from our old hood that haven’t. The guys are all (bigtime) drug dealers and are usually trying to make one of us their next babymomma (despite the fact that their married or otherwise in a long-term relationship. And the chicks tend to suck their teeth at us b/c we’re ding good and not too beat for them. “Stuck up is what I believe they call us. Ah well…anywho, despite alladat, when we go there to party it is all love. That place is truly like going home. The likelihood of getting shot is just as great here as it is at Barbara’s but for some reason, collectively we feel safer there, like somehow we know that the dude we grew up with would somehow make sure we made it to our car safely. We have also collectively agreed that we have no reason to truly believe this, but hey, it makes us feel safe enough to drink there. Lmao

After the Nitelite is usually Alice’s, the diner where everyone who was at the local bars comes to eat. We call it club Alice’s because it is like Barbara’s on steroids with pancakes and burgers instead of drinks. It gets so bad that sometimes you can’t even find a park/table/etc. Oh yea, and the likelihood of getting shot is THE GREATEST here since this is where ppl from different hoods in the city usually come to get their grub on after partying at their local hot spot. Plus it's on a main street that leads to our neighboring city and you just never know. Sometimes we just say ‘eff it” and head to the pizza parlor instead.

So there you have it. On the days when me and my girls just kinda wanna chill and drink, this is our schedule.

Now that that’s done, I will introduce you to The Street Fighter….in the next blog lol

BTW- Sweet Black Pipe and I met at The Sticky Rug

* The names of the bars have been changed to protect my identity and exact location. Some of ya'll seem cool but you anonymous folk tend to creep me out. lol But seriously...